Tuesday, December 6, 2011

trying to stay calm in all of this rush

It is already December 6th! I can't believe how this year has flown.
I have really been missing my MawMaw a lot this past few months. Today or yesterday was the Day she passed away but the date really doesn't matter. She's gone and my heart yerns for her to hold me. To listen to me whine like a baby. To make me snacks that I love and just make me feel like I am the most important person in the world to her. I know she had many special people but right now this isn't about them.
Lately I have been taking care of my Dad's mother, My Granny. She has been really sick and I have been sitting in the hospital with her threw out the day Mon-Thurs. She can't be by herself she has alztimers. As she sleep I glance over and I think of my precious MawMaw. All the wonderful times I spent with her, the stories she told me. How I chopped her legs because they hurt her so badly. She was a very sick women. Lots of health issues. I just miss her so badly right now. I wish I had her guidance. Her strength. I miss playing Bingo with her and Nanny. I miss the yard sales. I miss her rocking me at the age 20! Laugh....but I was and still am a big baby. I miss laying next to her sleeping and would make scary noses to try and get me all close to her. **smiles**
I miss coming in from outside and she having Kaylee a pallet on  the floor watching barney eating candy and drinking chocolate milk. Funny things you remember when someone is no longer here. Kaylee wont even touch chocolate milk now and thats been 8 years.
Seems like only yesterday I talked to her one last time. She sound like her mother, my Nanny. Like an angel. She told me she loved me and couldn't wait till we got home.
The next day she was GONE!
It was the longest day/drive ever!
We drove straight 25 hours...
I was a wreck....
Still kind of am when I play it back over in my mind......
Well I must be going to bed.

Till next time~Val

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